What to Do When You are Not Tranquil

A Course in Tranquility Lesson 12 of 14 — What to Do When You are Not Tranquil
We will begin this lesson with a discussion between Nisargadatta Maharaj, a 20th century master, and a
student.

Questioner: I have met many realized people, but never a liberated man. Have you come across a
liberated man, or does liberation mean, among other things, also abandoning the body?
Maharaj: What do you mean by realization and liberation?
Q: By realization I mean a wonderful experience of peace, goodness and beauty, when the world makes
sense and there is an all-pervading unity of both substance and essence. While such experience does not
last, it cannot be forgotten. It shines in the mind, both as memory and longing. I know what I am talking
about, for I have had such experiences.
By liberation I mean to be permanently in that wonderful state. What I am asking is whether liberation is
compatible with the survival of the body.
M: What is wrong with the body?
Q: The body is so weak and short-lived. It creates needs and cravings. It limits one grievously.
M: So what? Let the physical expressions be limited. But liberation is of the Self from its false and
self-imposed ideas; it is not contained in some particular experience, however glorious.

———–

As touched on earlier in this course, there is often the idea that tranquility and liberation of
consciousness indicate a glorified human condition. Sometimes, even when established in the Self, on
the surface of consciousness, violent waves or turbulence may arise, either in the form of health
challenges, relationship confusion, financial disparity, societal discord, or any other number of
unpleasant circumstances. The questioner, in the above passage, indicates that he thinks liberation
means abiding permanently in a wonderful state! The Maharaj reminds him that liberation is abidance in
the Self, and not abiding in identification with the changing phenomena the Self may witness.

Interacting in a world, through a mind and body, we have limitations. As it says in the Yoga
Sutras, in the chapter 3 on Soul Powers, that the reason we do not know everyone else’s thoughts, is
because that would result in confusion of minds. Here limitation is necessary. It does not say, we
cannot know other people’s thoughts, only that we don’t, to avoid confusion. We do not exist in this
world as completely unlimited, because we have agreed to play a role. If there was no limitation to our
roles, confusion would result, and nothing would ever get done, nor would any karma get exhausted.

Liberation being of the Self, we can turn within, know and be our real nature, yet return to the
world to play our part as it is necessary. Often we do not want to play our parts, because it is not
glorious, or wonderful, or like all the wonderful dramas on TV. The interesting thing to remember, is that
all those dramas on TV are imagination, and not real. We try to shape reality to match a fantasy, which
are distinctly different. Our real nature is beyond all of this. It is not fooled by fantasy, nor is it bound by
‘reality’. It simply is. And in that “is-ness” is beauty, love, and wisdom.

Our stories, our history, our past, those thoughts we habitually think, are those limitations with
which we identify. They are also the reasons we do not allow ourselves to be happy.  As Eckhart Tolle has
said, “Listen to people’s stories and they could all be entitled ‘Why I Cannot Be at Peace Now.’” We can
say things like:

“I cannot be at peace now, because I am not with that special someone.”
“I cannot be at peace now, because I don’t have enough information to be enlightened.”
“I cannot be at peace now, because I am confused about some areas of my life.”
“I cannot be at peace now, because I am dying.”
“I cannot be at peace now, because I am alive, and want to be dead.”
“I cannot be at peace now, because I don’t have a cigarette.”
“I cannot be at peace now, because I have no money.”
“I cannot be at peace now, because I have all the money in the world, and am still missing something.”
“I cannot be at peace now, because I had an unhappy childhood.”

The stories that are possible in this world are vast, and endless. This is precisely why our stories
don’t matter when it comes to tranquility. It is also why, even if we are not tranquil, we learn to let go of
identification with tranquility, in order to remain there. Attachment to peace and tranquility is still
attachment. Imagine if everything in your life was perfect, and yet for a moment or an hour or two you
become angry, depressed, agitated. Or maybe for a day, or a month or a year, you were sick. Rather
than letting it pass, which it will do one way or another, you dwell. Then, once it passes, you continue
dwelling, trying to figure out what it was all about. Why did you have that passing mood? Why did
you get sick? etc. etc. Tranquility is shaken, and we continue shaking it, even after the un-tranquil
situation passes.

This is not to say, that if you have a problem, you shouldn’t figure out what was causing it so you
can avoid future experiences of that problem. However, you can usually tell if a problem is worth using
energy to explore if it is recurrent. For example, if you have one bad relationship, but the rest were
pretty good, chances are, it isn’t much to worry about. If you have one bad relationship after another,
that might be an indication to explore possible causes and remedies. If you fall and bruise your leg, and
yet for the past twenty years, you have almost a perfect record of not falling, you can let that one pass
too. However, if you find that throughout your life, you’ve been clumsy, that might be an indication
that you could explore and remedy that problem.

What’s the answer to “What do I do when I’m not tranquil, or when things don’t work out
exactly as my expectations would suggest?” Let it pass.

Roy Eugene Davis, once told a story of a person who wrote to him. The writer had mentioned
how Mr. Davis writes and speaks about realizing our immortality and eternal life. The writer then went
on to say, how he found it a depressing possibility that he could potentially live forever. The problem
there, was that the writer was identified with his life situation. Mr. Davis, was not speaking about the
immortality of the life situation.

This is a common problem that many spiritual aspirants face. They do not understand what it
means to be spiritually liberated or to exist in tranquility, because they do not have a very good memory
of what that is like. They don’t remember what it is like to be identified with the immortal sense of “I
Am”. All they remember is immediate, limited life situation.

When we first learn to meditate, we are learning to calm the mind and emotions and to refine
the nervous system to be able to process clearer states of consciousness. When we first adopt
recommended lifestyle routines at the beginning of our spiritual path, we are making choices to cut back
on the amount of distractions we will have in life, so we can direct our energy to remembering and
re-establishing our consciousness in the timeless “I Am”.

After this becomes stable, we then dive deep, practicing holding our awareness as the “I Am”. It
is this practice, and they call it practice for a reason, that allows us to exist free, because we then know
what we are, beyond any doubt. We can also exist as we are, without doubt. When this realization
dawns, we know. No matter what anyone else says, or what the doubts of anyone else may be, we are
unmoved by them. Just as no one could make you doubt that a ripe red apple is sweet, no one could
shake you from the realization of your Self.

How is this done?

First we make sure our meditation practice is stable. This means we meditate every day with
alert, yet relaxed intention, and we have found a technique or an understanding of what it takes to calm
down the mind and emotions. That may include determining activities, foods, or personal interactions
that get your mind and emotions spinning, and minimizing their influence.

If you want to be Self-realized and Tranquil, you need to realize that meditation is an excellent
tool for that, but it must be understood properly. There is a stage beyond experiencing peacefulness
that needs to be activated for optimal benefits.

In stage two, you begin doing your best to exist as the “I am”. This is the state beyond:

“I am meditating.”
“I am a personality.”
“I have these likes and dislikes.”
“My breathe is quiet.”
“I am in a still room.”

You move to the simple experience of the room you are sitting. You simply experience the
thoughts that rise and fall in your mind. You simply feel a passing emotion or memory. All the while, you
are aware. You are not aware as being identified with anything in particular. You are aware of your
Self as the witnessing presence. You can’t see it. You can’t feel it. You can only be it.

You can drive your awareness deeper. With eyes closed, and in a very quiet room, you imagine
withdrawing your awareness from your senses. As you do this, memories, thoughts and emotions now
become “external.” You drive your awareness deeper, withdrawing your awareness away from even
these subjective internalized (yet still external from the vantage point of the Self) perceptions.

This takes dedication and practice. Some times it feels like it takes lots of energy and
concentration. The rewards are worth it. Even if you pull your awareness only to the level of being
aware of the memories, emotions and memories, that is good. Keep endeavoring to pull it deeper. One
day, you will withdraw even from that! If only for a second or two, it is progress. You continue, until it
becomes natural and easy.

As you get used to holding your awareness on this sense of “I Am”. It becomes easy. You have
been practicing so long, that you can hold your awareness there effortlessly, because you know how it’s
done. Just like driving a car may seem like a big task if you’ve never driven one, with practice you hardly
have to think about it. Be patient yet consistent. Continue practicing, and letting your self grow stronger
in concentration at your own rate. We all take to this work with varying backgrounds and abilities, but
we all reach the same state.

When All Else Fails

Sometimes we try. We use our self-effort. We apply all the knowledge that we have, and yet we
still fall into a space of sorrow or unconsciousness. When this occurs, a very good practice is learning to
surrender into grace. Now grace is our very own nature, and so we are essentially surrendering into our
Self. But you see we only fall into sorrow when we cannot shake free of the feeling of being limited as an
individualized being, a personality, a history, a series of expectations that needs fulfilled. We are much
vaster than all of that. Surrendering into grace is surrendering into that vastness, that is omnipotent and
omniscience and forever established in love and wisdom, at least, that is the closest words can come to
what it feels like.

How is it done? Wherever you are, you let go. You may be in pain, or in an uncomfortable
situation that you desperately wish to be different. You may be in a life situation and suddenly find your
self wanting to be in a much better place, or maybe you suddenly discover another avenue in life that is
more in line with your expression as a divine being of love, yet you have a history, and obligations, and
commitments that need fulfilling. You cannot see your self changing overnight, yet you desperately feel
the calling. You let go, and surrender into the vastness of your being. The little you can do nothing. You
know, because you’ve tried, or you’ve found your self too paralyzed to move.

Imagine or remember a time when you got a rock or a bug in your eye. It burns and hurts. Your
friend says, “Hey, I’ll help you out.” Yet every time they make a move to take the offending object out of
your eye, you flinch, close your eyes and pull away. Sure it may hurt a little more as the object is
removed, but if you relax, then in an instant, you can see again, and the sting is gone. That same
mechanism that would allow you to surrender to that aid, is the same mechanism, or feeling state that
accompanies surrender.

Whether it be in meditation, or prayer, or in daily living, when you have done your best, and you
cannot conceive of anything more you could do, try letting go. Surrender, knowing the rest of you, the
universe, will move in such away to either make the crooked roads straight, or provide the wisdom to
understand your situation with clarity. This may take practice, but it is well worth the effort. Give it a try
when you are not tranquil, and don’t fight it when your tranquility comes rushing back to you quicker
than your little self thinks it deserves.

Thought for the day: “Not even the very wise can see all ends.”

Sincerely, Ryan Kurczak 2010

Practicing a Single Truth

A useful tool we can use throughout our lives to move us into this state of awareness and tranquility is practicing a single truth.

Vasistha's Yoga

According to Vasistha’s Yoga we can experience tranquility and an enlightened state by adopting one of two mental positions. The first mental position is, “I am nothing. Nothing I see, experience or do, is me.” The second mental position is, “I am everything. Every thought, action, person, God, Goddess, experience, creature, and thing is me.”

#1 “I Am Nothing”

According to Nisargadatta Maharaj, to hold to the mental position that I am nothing, is wisdom. You become the space in which all things occur, and then not even that. You are awareness itself. You are aware of everything that passes through your field, yet you know it is not you. No longer identifying with anything, when things change, you are not disturbed. You are free.

#2 “I Am Everything”

According to Nisargadatta Maharaj, to hold the mental position that I am everything, is love. Now there is nothing which you are not. No matter what anyone does to you, you are doing it to your self. No matter the weather patterns, it’s ok. It’s just you anyway. Every concept of the divine is your very self. The smallest atom, to the vastness of the universe is you. You are doing everything, because you are everything. Here your mind can expand beyond its small confines, and thought itself becomes unnecessary, because as you can see, everything is happening without thought anyway!

What does this do to the mind?

Our problems arise when the mind becomes engaged. We have to think about things, figure things out. We try, and sometimes our conclusions line up with experience, and sometimes they fall far from the mark, and often we notice that correlation between the two is random.
The mind is for storing information. It is for balancing your check book, writing a coherent letter, or planning a house, or calculating a physics equation. The mind is not meant for figuring things out beyond remembering and calculating.

If you hold the state that “I am nothing”, then you have nothing to think about. Your thinking doesn’t matter. You are in neutral, being nothing. You find that the world continues, even without your thoughts to validate it. Thoughts still arise. You still get up in the morning and make bacon and eggs for breakfast. Yet, none of this is you. You don’t have to think about it anymore.

If you hold the state that “I am everything”, then you don’t have to think about interacting with the world in particular ways. It’s all you. You continue to learn and grow and change, and yet your thoughts don’t matter, because it happens anyway. You still exist as everything. If someone gives you a million dollars, you don’t have to think about why you deserved it. You gave it to your self. If someone runs into your car, you don’t have to contemplate what karma led to this, it was just something you felt like doing at that time.

Now they mind will resist and rail against this. You may even think this is total crap, and a good way to get out of responsibility for your actions. Well, according to the Gita, you are not the doer of anything anyway. God is the doer. When you claim responsibility, you claim karma. Then you have to suffer the good and bad of your fate. If you are everything or nothing, then it doesn’t matter, you experience your self, as it is. No need for judgement, or reasons.
This does not indicate that you will become a base and vile person either. The natural impulse of consciousness is towards harmony and peace. When you give up identification with mind, through consistent practice of one of these truths, you will find that your actions are actually in accord with a higher process.

The Cycle of Life Continues Beyond the Mind

Think of nature. The flowers grow. The cows eat the grass. The lions eat the cows. The sun shines. The clouds rain. Sometimes those flowers areweeds, and sometimes they are roses. Sometimes the cows are clearing a field, and sometimes they are destroying it. Sometimes the lion is providing food for his young, and sometimes he is removing a sick or lame cow from the heard. Sometimes the sun shines and brings life to the marigolds, and sometimes the sun scorches the earth and kills people of heat stroke. Sometimes the rains water the gardens, and sometimes they swell the rivers and destroy villages. That is what happens.

If you want to burden your self with responsibility and karma, you are welcome to it. It is your mind that tricks you into thinking this little person is so important, that your responsibility will truly make a difference. By practicing a single truth, until you know it fully as reality, the mind cannot keep a hold on you. Then you move beyond the mind, and act with the same grace and naturalness as the natural world. You realize the “little you” is an expression of the wholeness of life and its cycles, and from this knowledge, your awareness expands until it is fully absorbed by the you that is the wholeness of life itself.

This may seem overwhelming, or so far beyond your current scope of understanding. That’s fine. You have to start somewhere, and this is the starting point. Contemplate which one of those truths with which you feel you resonate most easily. Then write it down somewhere you will see it often. Put it in your meditation space too. Put it beside your bed. Put it anywhere you spend a lot of time.

Then, moment by moment, day by day, year by year, imagine your truth as a reality for you. Explore what you might feel like if it was true, right now. Dedicate your self to its practice. You will find as you ripen, the implication of the truth will dawn within your understanding. You will know its reality, just as assuredly as you know your self as a man or a woman. It won’t be a thought or a concept, but a direct experience.

In this way, every moment of your day becomes imbued with tranquility, and divine remembrance.

Learning to Be In Truth

I was recently asked a pertinent question through email, one I’ve pondered and explored on many occasions. Being human, I think it a natural question and one that might be worth considering for more people than just myself and the questioner. Your thoughts and contemplations are welcome in this discussion. Use the “comment” option at the bottom of this post to participate.

Question: I want to be fully established in Truth.  What can I do now to aid in that reality?

Response: There are a few levels to consider.

By consistent and intentional meditation practice we learn to calm our minds and our emotions. We learn that we are not our personality, and we learn to exist in peace, for the sake of existing in peace. Our meditation is charged by our intention. By meditating, practicing our techniques, with devotion to cleaning off the mirror that reflects our true Self, then each practice draws us closer to the pure reflection.

Once we can sit calmly, internalized, then we direct our attention to Truth.  Truth is eternal.  It is not based on the transient world of form,

Learning to Know What You Are Through All Changing Phenomena is Key

although there can be relative truths there.  We ask, “what am I?” as though we really want to know. Then we wait for a response.  The mind may throw up ideas, such as, you are a yoga teacher, or a daughter, or this body, a spiritual person, or an angry person, or someone who is depressed. When these arise, you know you are not them, because you can be aware of them as an object, and you are not an object. So youcontinue, and maybe you experience bliss and joy.  Again, this is an experience, and if you can experience it, it is an object, and it has come into your awareness, and so can leave your awareness, therefore not eternal, and not you.

Eventually, there comes a point when no more answers come forth from the mind, only a knowing that you exist. This may last for a brief instant or a long time. Now, this existence actually is beyond time and space, so it becomes tricky, because you might say, well that experience has come and gone, so therefore is not real. However, that existence has been there before you were born, during your life, in sleep, and in dreams, and will persist. The lack of stability is not stemming from unreality, but comes from a lack of ability to hold attention on this reality.  Practice is required, and with all things, the more we practice with intention and enthusiasm, the greater our ability becomes, until it becomes natural and effortless, and we regain our ‘natural’ state.

In daily life, we move into the witnessing space. Life unfolds based on our past choices, thoughts and actions. As the witness, we can acknowledge the expression of our past choices, and we can choose in the present to let those choices exhaust themselves, or put energy towards another experience. As the witness, we know we are not that which we see “out there”, and we are free to act as best we can given the circumstances.

By remaining the witness, when circumstances occur we ask, “is this me?” Say a negative experience arises, or someone treats us in a way that was not called for based on our behavior. We ask, “is this me?” Waiting for the answer, we either have it revealed to us, that yes we did act in such a way to bring about that experience, or we realize, “no.” this is something unconscious in the other person playing out.  Then we release it, let it exhaust itself.  In doing this, you loosen your attachment to having such experiences, and the other persons need to provide such experience weakens as well.  The more this happens, the easier it is to move into the state of timeless existence as mentioned above, because you note that much of what you thought was so important, wasn’t really you after all!

We endeavor to be as honest as possible, about what we want in life, about our intentions with people, and about our intentions with our self, and also about the inspiration that comes through us.

There is that which continues even through sleep, which is you, which transcends the personality.

Being born human, with a body, mind, history, personality and family pattern, we may not have had the proper role models to show us the merit in honesty, both with our selves, other people, and the divine. And it is hard in the beginning. But it doesn’t have to be. The more we know what we are and can be that, the easier it is to know and be truth. So the above practices allow this to happen naturally, although it may take time. By doing our best to be honest on all levels, even when we fail, as long as we are honest that we failed for whatever reason, it is still carrying us towards that embodiment.  Patience is necessary. But we must be honest about doing our best. Being established in truth requires the earnestness and intention to be held in the minds eye.  The expression of consciousness follows the minds eye. It may have to pass through some muddy transformation to get there, but it can also happen effortlessly and beautifully, depending on how we see it in our minds eye.

I want to be fully established in Truth.  What can I do to aid in that reality?

1) Meditate daily and deeply to a state of calm connectedness, then directing your attention to the heart, the spiritual eye, or the crown of the head, ask “What am I? What am I that has existed through out all time and space?”  Once you simply know “I AM”. Then hold your awareness as pure existence for as long as you can each day.

2) As you live each day, remain as the witness, in loving, working, eating, playing, striving. Ask, “Is this me?” Until you can love, work, eat, play, and strive, knowing what you are as being the “space” in which all these activities occur.

3) Acknowledge your human embodiment. Admit where you are in your development. Then note what you need to change in your mind, heart, and consciousness to accept the truth of your nature, and how your actions can align with this truth and no longer contradict your truth. Take one step at a time, picking your self up when you fall, ignoring the jeers of others (or even your mind) pointing out how you’ve failed and can’t experience that truth because of all the mistakes you made in the past, then keep walking, taking actions that do not contradict the embodiment of truth, until you are strong, and are moving forward like a juggernaut until you break down the wall, that has kept you blind to the truth of your nature, which has never wavered, even when you weren’t paying attention.

4) Relax and have fun. See your self in all life, and all life in you. Walk in nature, be with enjoyable supportive people, Be with those You Love in person or in spirit,  serve people who could benefit from your skills, and be creative and choose happiness.

Love,

Ryan Kurczak